The Carlson Tucker Interview with Suchir Balaji's mother

 Last week, I watched the Carlson Tucker interview with Suchir Balaji's mother.

After the cooling off period also, my mind is NUMB at the travesty of justice happening here.

To be named a material witness but be provided NO Protection at all.

To be killed the night he returned from a holiday.

To have a wig at the crime scene and not even bother to examine it.

If he shot himself at one spot, why is there blood at multiple spots?

And I tend to agree with her - Suchir was not threatening someone's business. The punishment for that would be not having a job in the industry.

When our young professionals hear the stories of whistleblowers, they hear imprisonment in a single embassy for years, death, and at the very least, a transfer order. Just once, I would like them to hear a story that ends with success. So they learn to speak up.

#SuchirBalaji

2024 Reading Summary

20 books. That's one book every 18.5 days. 

Three non-fiction. The rest are all fiction, detective fiction, short stories, or poetry. 

One was a comic book and one was a joke book. 

Fewer Hindi books on the list than I would like. 

Have ordered 3 Punjabi books also. 2025 resolution is to start reading Punjabi and to read a lot more Hindi.  

First Target: Malvikagnimitram. 

Book Review: Rework

Nothing makes one read faster than the deadline of "Books Read in Year 2XYZ". The TBR pile depletes at a rather healthy rate, making the rest of the year wonder what was wrong with them. 

Rework came highly recommended by a Whatsapp group I truly like, and it did not disappoint. 

The book is a series of contrarian micro lessons from Jason Fried and David H Hansson, ably edited by Matt. 

But here's the catch: These lessons are not coming from an expert coach or academician (nothing wrong with those, just saying), but from practitioners - folks who have built their business ground up using these principles. 

Each principle is titled in a funny yet accurate way. The book's tone is very engaging. 

Here are my favourite three principles: 

> You need less than you think: Make do with what you have and get cracking. In time, you will need the entire razzamatazz, but you don't need everything set up just so before you can start working. 

> Don't scar on the First Cut: The first time someone comes into work wearing inappropriate clothing, don't make a policy. Counsel the person. Don't set up unnecessary rules to avoid the exceptions. Deal with the exceptions. 

> Inspiration is Perishable: You might have a great idea right now. That idea will stay, but your motivation to work on it will not. So work on the idea when it is still fresh.  

But my most favourite one is this, and its self-explanatory: ASAP is poison. Use your emergency tone only for real emergencies. 

Review 

I loved the book because a lot of this contrarian advice is actually what I practice. So, lots of validation. 

But objectively speaking, the tips are both simple and simplistic. 

 Not everything will apply to everyone. Not all tips will work for all organisations. 

Read the book, enjoy the witty language and the micro tips. But do not treat this as the Bible of building businesses. If, like me, you are contrarian, by all means, do enjoy the validation also. :) 

How to choose a life partner

 Marriage is like gardening. Every morning, you get up and start working. So, the first advice i want to give is that you have to DECIDE to invest in a life with someone else. Too many of us focus on what we will *get* from a partner or marriage. Focus also on what value you will add to the life of another person, and get ready to put in the hard work. Whether you are a man or a woman, learning to give love is as important as learning to receive love with a sense of gratitude. 

Two generations ago, marriages were done like contracts. Both families decided on many factors and then the bride and groom got involved. We still need to navigate those factors, but by ourselves now. 

This is my suggestion: 

A. Values - list what your values are, and choose someone where there is values alignment. 

B. Pay attention to the family - When they meet, do they respect each other? Do you find genuine affection in their conduct towards each other? Irrespective of what you are seeing right now in your prospective partner, the ONLY behaviour pattern he really knows is the one he has seen and done in the house. So, if the two parents are not listening to each other, if one of them is doing all the talking and the other is doing all the nodding, rest assured that your life will look a lot like that too. Some people are ok with that, some are not. You can decide. 

C. Finance and Moneys - Have an open chat about wealth creation, contribution to expenses, contribution to respective parents. Discuss any pending and upcoming loans, family liabilities, financial responsibilities (like if you have a younger sibling whom you have to settle, tell them upfront), etc. 

D. Children and Caregiving - How many children and when. It is perfectly fine for the mother to be the primary caregiver to kids or elderly parents, but at that time, the financial burden needs to shift completely to the other partner. Likewise if the father decides he cannot handle workplace stress and wants to take a break. The financial burden shifts completely to the mother and the caregiving responsibilities go completely to the father. Best to have this discussion before you get married. 

E. Dietary and Cultural Practices - Small but important changes in our diet and culture is like carrying a glass of water - for 40 years. Figure out if something is a dealbreaker for you and stay true to it. 

F. Expectations from a partner - Ask your partner what role they want you to play in their life, and tell them what you would like too. If TLC is important to you and your partner believes that actions speak louder than words, that is going to be difficult. Likewise, if your partner expects support irrespective of life events, and you just cannot handle, say, the loss of a job, then its not the right fit. In one marriage, the husband said he just could not deal with a fat wife, even if the fatness was a result of bearing his child!! 

One question i often get is around chemistry and physical attraction. What i have observed is, that we start to find people we love physically attractive. So unless something is absolutely abhorrent to you, you can safely ignore this. The most smouldering chemistry succumbs to the first emotional manipulation. Some great lovemaking starts with a caring embrace. Unlike dating, where physical chemistry matters A LOT, in marriage, its not as important. We change physically and so does our partner. 

Treat it like you would treat a job search. 

Put "About Us" first (What you bring to the table) 

Then the JD (expectations) 

Then do the selection procedure. 

Then, commit to the relationship and give it your best shot. 

Sorry, very logical and left brained answer.  

Oh, Amazon!

You know that 3 click rule we learnt back in the 90s on user experience Design? 

Amazon Prime UX designers have obviously never heard of it. 

6 clicks to see ANYTHING, and I am not counting the ads we have to navigate. (by the way, those trailers are the best way to ensure we NEVER watch that junk) 

 

Dream Adventures

https://thedreamadventures.com/contact

So these guys apparently tapped a credit card to figure out if the card was eligible for some promotion scheme and ended up charging 10,000 to someone. They are now insisting that the customer has to buy services and not get a refund. 

Customer claiming fraud transaction did not help. 

Sunday Thought Question

I think it is fair to say that retail is struggling. 

From Amazon to Blinkit, the competition is unprecendented. Nothing in the history of retail prepares us for this. 

And yet, some retail stores are doing well, while many others are shutting shop or scaling down. 

Each of us might have some experience and insight into retail - either as supporters, or as consumers. 

In your view, the retail stores that are doing well - What are they doing right? 

And the ones that are failing - What could they have tried to do?